WHO: The Dreaming Tree WHAT: 67% Merlot, 33% Zinfandel WHEN: 2009 WHERE: Geyserville, CA HOW: First, the dreams of fraternity brothers are harvested by hand. They are cold soaked in Miller Lite for two days & then fermented in oak from the rocking chairs of Cracker Barrel for five years. It is the fifth year that gives the wine its maturity.

WHY: Fueled by a resentment for having to listen to Dave Matthews Band seemingly every day of my formative years, I pulled The Dreaming Tree’s “Crush,” off the shelves of my local big name grocer. The Dreaming Tree wines are sold as a collaboration between Simi winemaker Steve Reeder & musician Dave Matthews. I was absolutely shocked that the marketing-powers-that-be chose “Crush” as the red blend’s name, instead of the obvious Dave Mathews Band tie-in “Crash.” (Ed. Note: Further research has shown that ‘The Dreaming Tree’ and ‘Crush’ are also the names of Dave Matthews Band songs, from 1998.) Why, in sheer Googlitude alone, ‘crash wine’ would be a much easier page ranking to top than ‘crush wine’ in a sea of custom crush pads, harvest blogs, etc.

The front label is innocuous in a tea-stained parchment style with a line drawn tree. I turned the bottle around half-expecting to read Modesto, CA, city of Gallo fame, but instead found Geyserville, CA. A brief investigation proved it to be a product of Constellation Wines. There are also, what are supposed to be a couple of authenticity inspiring blurbs from the star & winemaker, however, they served to prove nothing except that Dave Mathews was authentically stoned.

The passage is included for your reading pleasure below:

Two Hot Dogs in a Pick-up
A hot day
Two dogs
Chase a stick
Thrown into a pond
Again and again
The older, slower dog
Never gets the stick
And moans at the effort
But always goes in
“Maybe this time”
-Dave Matthews

Charming. When I uncorked the bottle, I found that the opening volley doesn’t have the sweetness or the full mouthfeel that one expects from a grocery store brand. In fact, it was surprisingly sour to start, instead of fruit forward, hinting only at unripe mulberries & pomegranate. The fruit hits about mid-palate, with strong blueberry flavors. The finish continues to be sour with gritty tannins. You would think that a wine geared towards the backwards baseball cap wearers of the 90s with this flavor profile would pair well with grilled meats or other alma mater tailgating fare. However, this wine blew it when paired with bacon. Bacon.

This wine appears to be non-vintage without the blend components printed on the label. However, the information is available on the Internet from various wine shops carrying the bottle. Chances are, they’ve left it open to reblend later to accommodate different harvest’s fruit and create a consistent product. This is not to say that additives might not contribute to that consistency as well. Snark aside, the wine is drinkable, but the price point near $15 will last until the novelty wears off.

One further note, this wine appears to be a branded product that takes advantage of a particular person’s fame in the way that Ed Hardy & Banana Republic wine or 50 Cent’s Vitamin Water flavor, “Formula 50,” do. Personally, I don’t see any reason to draw conclusions from the tasting of this wine to Steve Reeder’s work at Simi Winery, or Dave Matthew’s Blenheim Vineyards in Virginia, since neither originated in a think tank.

Ben & Renee’s Wine in Brief: Let’s just start out by saying that this eclectic blend is like nothing we’ve seen before. We’re fairly unenthusiastic when it comes to Italian reds but when the Sommelier at Piccolo brought us this gem of a bottle and we first took a whiff, we couldn’t wait to indulge ourselves in its complexity. This Italian blend reminded us that Zinfandel does in fact have a long lost older sister. Its dark fruit, toasted date and perfectly smooth mouthfeel made for nothing short of an incredible drinking experience. It might have been the setting, a tiny bourgie restaurant in the heart of Venice beach in the middle of an impressive 4 course meal, however, this particular wine would entrance anyone, no matter where they were sitting. The nose is seductive but it is a mere precursor to the taste; the wine’s rich and velvety tannins made for a well-balanced finish that lingers like a penguin on an iceberg. The Edizione Cinque Autoctoni is decadence meets religion; we promise it will have you praying to find it again. Our later soul-searching uncovered that you can also find this bottle at a favorite hipster stomping ground, Waterloo & City in West Los Angeles.

WHY: As of late Napa Cellars is bringin’ it back, “back to basics,” that is. Typically, when you think “basic” you think “boring“, but the 2007 Zinfandel turned out to be a pleasant treat for us Hipsters. They’re making wines that will keep people comfortable, as they like to put it, and there‘s nothing wrong with being comfortable if you‘re trying to live in L.A. In their most recent vintage release, which includes a Cab Sauv, Merlot, Chardonnay, and Zinfandel, they have accomplished just that. From the moment we first inhaled, our eyes lit up as we picked up strong notes of dried cherry, dark berry cobbler, cinnamon spice, and brandy on the nose. Once it coated our eager palate, the rich dark fruit, black pepper, and cinnamon flavors fell into subtlety, revealing a more delicate Zin despite the 15.3% alcohol. Cue group exhale. The 12% Petite Sirah acts as an excellent filler and gives it that mid-palate, velvety mouth feel that makes you want to sneakily pour yourself that lil’ extra when no one else is looking so you can get to know it better. Not only did this Zin deliver, it helped soothe the soul after a long work week which makes this wine perfect for cozying up by a fire or ideal for backyard bbq-ing and bocce ball

The Wrap: I think we all agree with the winemaker’s sentiment about bringing it “back to basics.” Being on a budget while still wanting to live the good life, we LOVE being able to enjoy a bottle that sells for $22 but tastes like $50. Someone was kind enough to send us this quartet of goodness to sample, but next time we see this gorgeous bottle sitting on the shelf, we’re most definitely taking it back to Hipster headquarters. As the economy picks back up, and we one day make those 6 figure incomes, not only will we be able to purchase our plot of land in Napa, but we won’t forget wines like this. We applaud you Napa Cellars for speaking our language and helping us happily indulge in guilt-free, old-school “Hipster Nights.

We’ve developed a strong affinity for Lodi wines, recognizing the familiar terroir at first whiff. Beyond that, we didn’t get any pleasant notes from the nose. One of the hipsters sniffed piña colada & moldy oak while another mentioned the aroma of bowling alley shoe disinfectant with a slight mint note. Tasting notes were limited to grapefruit rind and soggy strawberries. For a cab, the wine lacked tannin and made up for it with unpleasant acid in spades.

The Wrap: Sure, we bought the wine at Big Lots for a grand total $3.00 plus CRV, but that doesn’t automatically make it a loser. Not all $3.00 cabs are bad; but this is an exception to that exception. It was thin, light, and bruised like the sad animals in the Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercials. This isn’t a wine we’ll be buying again though it might make a good cooking wine, as it already tastes a little like red wine vinegar.